Why Your Summer Reset Shouldn’t Be Another Self-Improvement Project
If you feel like summer vacation doesn’t really give you the relief you’re looking for…
It’s not you. You’re not broken. And you’re also not alone.
Summer is supposed to be the season of rest, sunshine, long walks, lake days, beach days, porch sitting, and remembering you’re a real human being — not just a highly responsible task-completing machine in sensible shoes.
But for a lot of us, especially high achievers dealing with corporate burnout, summer doesn’t always feel restful.
Even when there’s vacation time available, many workers don’t use all of it.
A Pew Research Center article shows that 46% of U.S. workers with paid time off take less than they’re offered, often because they worry about falling behind, feel bad about coworkers taking on extra work, or don’t feel they need more time off.
And even when they do take time off, the stress can come right back the minute the inbox opens again.
So if you’re halfway through the year feeling foggy, tired, unmotivated, or a little disconnected from yourself, it doesn’t mean you need to reinvent your life by Monday.
Maybe you just need a summer reset — a softer kind of burnout recovery — that helps you come back to more of who you already are.
I recently went up to the lush, green Appalachian mountains for just a 3-day, 4-night stay and came back thinking a lot clearer about what I want to achieve and how to do it without pushing myself back into burnout.
Visiting the Appalachians put me back in touch with where I grew up so much that I really began to feel myself again— something I lost when I was trying to fit into the life everyone else had in mind for me.
You may not have a trip planned that will take you back to your upbringing. Heck, you may not have a trip planned at all.
And I don’t want you to feel like you have to go out and plan one.
Coming up with the idea of where to go, how much time you can get away, how to pay for it or coordinating with others can pile on the pressure.
That’s why in this blog, we’re going to focus on a different approach that brings relief from all life’s pressure so you can feel more like yourself again, without having to worry about a summer trip.
What’s Not Working
Even though you may be feeling disconnected and worn-down, pushing yourself toward a “quick-fix” summer retreat could turn into just another job for you.
And if you do get any rest while you’re away, the effects of that rest may not last once you’re back in your routine.
Why?
We end up putting so much pressure on ourselves to make the summer trip about improving ourselves rather than just reconnecting with who we already are.
We make plans and set expectations of all the summer reset goals we’re going to do for ourselves because we’re good at planning, goal setting and self-discipline.
That was me.
I would fill up my vacation days with those self-improvement plans just like I filled up my calendar like I was back in my sales days.
In those days, I had to choose what companies to call, what to say, how to approach their issues with solutions and when to do all of this — by myself. It took tons of work and self-discipline.
But those vacation days to reset myself? Well, they still never worked.
At first, I thought it was maybe because they were personal goals, not professional ones.
And the last thing I wanted to do in my personal time was more work. The job wore me down enough.
Then I thought maybe it was just me.
Maybe I just wasn’t hardwired as a go-getter. Or maybe I just wasn’t feeding myself the right nutrients to keep me motivated.
But that wasn’t it either…
So what was making those reset plans unachievable?
What I discovered was that under chronic stress and burnout, your brain is not optimized for big goals, it’s optimized for staying alive.
Of course you feel foggy, unmotivated, and a little hopeless.
That’s when you look for short term relief instead.
The executive functioning part of your brain that handles planning and follow-through goes dim. Your threat detector turns up, and your reward system starts running on fumes.
This is why you might reach for the sugary foods that knock you off your weight loss track. Or spend time on social media instead of working on the self-improvement time you were thinking about. Or fill your vacation with activities instead of slowing down by the bright, blue water (or taking a calm ride on a sailboat 😉).
I also discovered that too many of the goals I kept setting for myself were about changing myself, rather than enhancing all the good things I already was.
And trying to change can cause more chronic stress and burnout, and more pressure for the nervous system that’s already taxed.
That’s not a character flaw or the wrong diet — that’s a taxed nervous system trying to take care of us.
A Different Approach
Instead of turning summer into another self-improvement project that can be over-taxing for your nervous system, let’s make it more of a gentle summer reset.
Let’s work on calming your nerves so your nervous system feels safe.
That way you can think more clearly, plan more precisely, and allow yourself the time to reconnect to you…
because you already plan and set goals well, you just do it better when you relax into it, and calm your nervous system first.
Summer is a good time for enjoying the outdoors and allowing for breathing room. And research has shown that short breaks and nature exposure are linked to stress recovery.
A 2022 PLOS ONE meta-analysis found microbreaks can support well-being by reducing fatigue and increasing vigor, and a 2022 office-based study found short virtual nature breaks helped with stress recovery.
So even short breaks can help your system recover — especially when they pull you away from work mode and back into your body.
Here are 3 practices you can do throughout your day while you’re at work or home that will help you feel like you’re on a summer break from anywhere.
1. The 5-Minute Brain Dump (Not Journaling)
For me, writing down what was on my mind was the first way I began to help myself relax.
This isn’t “journaling about your feelings” as if you’re in a therapy session. This is just journaling for overthinking, getting those thoughts on paper and out of your head so you can calm the ruminating and settle down.
It’s jotting down things you need to take care of, things you’re worried you’ll forget, and things you “should” do that go round and round in your brain.
Because our brains treat “unfinished tasks” like alarms that keep pinging you in the background. This can build tension and start to shut your brain down, sending you into survival mode and keep you focused only on ending the stress.
Getting them onto paper reduces that mental load, which was explained with more detail in the Zeigarnik effect findings.
And women with this mental load can especially get burned out.
How does it work?
Think of it as a brain dump for burnout and overthinking.
When you notice yourself in your thoughts and not paying attention to what you’re doing at that moment, you can:
⚪ Set your timer for 3 minutes
⚪ Grab a pen & paper
⚪ Write whatever you’re thinking about
There’s no analysis necessary. No dissection of your childhood. And no need to file it anywhere.
It’s just giving your brain a place to rest the mental clutter, and giving your nervous system a bit of a rest.
2. The 5-4-3-2-1 Desk Reset (Checking In with Yourself)
This is a great way to get a sense of yourself and recognize more of you by touching base with your reality in one single moment.
When your brain is spinning and overthinking spikes, you check-in with reality by using your 5 senses for a micro-reset at your desk.
It’s a reset for your brain by grounding you in the moment where you’re safe, you’re ok, and you don’t have to solve any problems right then and there.
The 5 senses grounding technique pulls your attention away from racing thoughts and back into the present moment, which reduces anxious arousal and helps the nervous system shift out of threat mode.
Here’s how to do this 5-4-3-2-1 Desk Reset:
Privately while you’re sitting at your desk just pick —
5 things you can see (the mug, the window, the pen, etc.)...
4 things you can feel (chair under you, feet on floor, fabric on your skin, palms on your thighs)...
3 things you can hear (printer, HVAC, cars, coworkers)...
2 things you can smell (coffee, your lotion… or just “nothing noticeable”)...
1 thing you can taste (sip of water, gum, or just the taste in your mouth)
This only takes 60 - 90 seconds and the great part is no one else has to know what you’re doing.
3. The Email Exhale Break (Not heavy “breathwork”)
It’s not meditation, it’s only one minute to take the edge off. No pressure. Not learning something new. It’s just a long exhale breathing technique.
This can give you a quick rest and reduce your stress. This slow, controlled breathing — especially with a longer exhale — activates the parasympathetic nervous system which lowers your heart rate, aids your digestion and conserves your energy.
Talk about feeling like your real self again!
A good time to do this is before you look over emails or go into a meeting. Or you can do this after lunch to help you digest well and possibly keep your energy higher.
All you do is inhale gently through your nose for a count of 3–4, hold for 1-2 and exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of 6–8, and repeat 6–10 times (about a minute).
No candles. No cushions. And again…no one else has to know what you’re doing.
The Summer of More You
So instead of putting pressure on yourself by trying to make your summer reset about redesigning your entire life this year, try giving yourself these 3 small gifts:
A place to put your racing thoughts (brain dump), a way to come back to the real you (5-senses reset) and a quick minute to tell your body it’s not under attack (long exhale).
Because when you feel 2% safer, you think 20% clearer.
And when you think clearer, you start to feel more yourself with a gentle nervous system reset. Not with a brand-new personality, but with a calmer body that can listen to what you really want and need so you can live more of a life that fits.
The Summer Break Reinvent Yourself alternative…
More reset. More calm life. More you.
If this summer reset feels like the kind of relief your nervous system has been asking for, I created something to help you take the next small step.
My free Calm Life Reset Guide is a gentle starting point for burned-out women who are tired of pushing, overthinking, and trying to become someone new.
It’s not about overhauling your whole life overnight.
It’s about calming the noise, reconnecting with yourself, and beginning to build a life that actually feels like it fits.
Get the free Calm Life Reset Guide here → https://annesane.com/recover-from-burnout-guide/
Many Blessings ~
Anne
Annie Belle, you’ve done it again. I was trying to figure out what to do with myself after I retired. I’m not a sit around kid of person so sitting and watching TV was not appealing. I wanted to do some travelling, but didn’t want to go by myself and when I travel, I tend to try to stuff as much fun, sightseeing, adventuring and touristy things as I can. Then I don’t enjoy the break and I’m exhausted when I get home and no one wants to be around me.
You really got into my head with this one. I need to go back and read it again to make sure I didn’t miss anything. I hope you’re enjoying your amazing life and have found some peace and quiet. I love you and your blogs. I’m going to go re-read them all. I know I missed something. LOL
Awww, Neva-Nu! You’re such a beautiful soul. I miss our chats! What an inspiration you are to still go adventuring yet know yourself well enough to recognize what happens if you exhaust yourself. 💜 Thank you for your kind message. You give me the motivation to keep sharing what I’ve learned. I truly hope to cross paths with you soon!!